March 25, 2018 + Photos

            It’s…been a rough patch.  Not in terms of like…bad stress?  Just a lot of exhaustion just because I’ve had less time for myself.  Between trying to fix my sleeping schedule and welcoming our new teacher, I’ve had about 1 day to myself a week and far fewer hours after work, all of which is less than ideal.  School is fine, I like our new arrival, she’s cool, and both my bosses are here now, so…pins and needles, folks, pins and needles.

            Life at the school is better, we have a much happier and friendlier atmosphere overall.  Lots of students are leaving because of graduation or changes in their lifestyle, it happens at the end of every March, apparently.  It’s sad.  I will miss a number of them.  Life goes on, but…

            I do want to say, I’ve had a case of the sads lately.  Largely just nostalgia and missing home.  A comic was updated recently that reminded me of my best friend and how much I miss her.  New Overwatch update makes me miss half of my friends and talking with my DnD buddies makes me miss DnD and the other half of my buddies.  Life here is fine, but…I miss people, you know?

            In other news, I got to see Shirioshi castle as part of a team building exercise, and then we headed to Kitsune Mura, the fox village.  Took lots of pictures of cute foxes and other animals.  It’s not exactly restful because even if you move less during a road trip, it’s not your personal time.  That said, I did have a good experience with this adventure, got to know my new colleague, and saw some more rural areas in the Miyagi region. There were a few parties to send people off as well, since the students are graduating, and more team building with my bosses. I got to try an excellent Chinese place I must go back to next time I’m in Sendai.  And more Amiibos.  I don’t buy that many, actually.  I just found one or two I really wanted…nostalgia, mostly.  Cloud Strife and Mewtwo.  Fists in the air for Smash Bros Brawl Switch.  That also reminds me, I miss my brother.  I wish we could play together like we used to.  I also miss my niece, who’s just growing like a weed, hehe.

            Enough maudlin crap.  Today, I also saw a play.  I tried out the dry cleaning near my house, it was time to get my blankets cleaned, and it worked well, but I was so tired.  But, I was given a ticket to see this play and had just enough time to see it before our team building, so…I went for it.  I was called and one of my students was in it, so I answered.  It was done by a group of students ranging from elementary to junior high and maybe high school.  I’m not sure what I was expecting, but…they went all out.  The story is pretty fairy tale-esque, as it was about a fairy helping a group of people by letting toys come alive and be their inspiration.  In the end, everyone goes off to pursue their dreams and everyone is happy.  However, we had major production values.  Choreographed dancing with up to 40 students of all ages, all in sync.  Great singing, mics on basically everyone, audience interaction, and lots of small touches that others could miss, but which just make it that more…wow.  For example, our main heroine, a little girl, comes in on her scooter and hits a magic fairy.  Like 30 students gather around her to talk and sing, and off to the side, the fairy is acting her heart out like she just got hit by a truck and is crawling around on the floor to safety and no one on stage is paying attention to her, but it just adds to the whole scene.  It’s funny, charming, and excellent.  Or the amazing computer programmer who’s singing about giving a great gift to a girl he likes, is doing cartwheels and flips(yes, really) and behind him, a delinquent just takes his present, blows him a kiss, and casually strolls off scene like it’s no big thing and he doesn’t see her at all.  It’s the little things that make it shine, but the music and singing were top notch, stuff like this would, I think, even impress Broadway.  There are some weird moments, though, like when our heroine gets kidnapped, RIGHT NEXT TO the male leads and no one pays it any mind.  Then they get a note.  And then EVERYONE whines about their own problems before the old mentor tells them to get their act together and they are like, “Oh yeah, kidnapped…” it’s part of the charm, but very much a play.  I had a great time, though, I imagine I stuck out like a sore thumb. The foreigner in the black coat amongst all the families there to see their kids.

            Before I show photos, a few random thoughts from both Japan and the internet.  Why do people try and use English with me when I speak Japanese with them?  I can speak the language, guys.  Best quote from my friend in regards to America, “It’s like everyone is trying to pretend the government isn’t imploding.” And finally, I get sick of people online and off who try to assume they know what’s best for everyone or who denigrate a person because they’re tired or sick or not feeling well from something that wouldn’t put anyone else down.  Different people have different tolerances, so don’t tell people how to live.  And those are my random thoughts and frustrations.  Photo time!

Map of Shirioshi castle, beautifully illustrated

Love plum blossoms, it reminds me of Sumi

Fox Village time.  So cute!  So floofy!

Also goats!

Also mutant rabbits from...wait, what?!  These are mara, they're like rabbits with deer legs.

Proper rabbits

Guinea pigs!

So cuuuuuuuuuute!

March 12, 2018 + Photos

March 12, 2018 + Photos

            It’s been a week.  No, this does not mean weekly updates are coming back.  I’m toying around with timing, deal with it. Also photos.  I have photos to share from before 2018, so...there's that. Anyway, the atmosphere at work has been very pleasant, of late.  I’ve had time to relax…kind of.  See, even with time to relax, I tend to just do more work, but it’s the atmosphere I appreciate.  The atmosphere is much more easy-going for everyone present.  Of course, my boss is here as well, so…I’m nervous. Like ya do. He’s actually been lending me some stuff to broaden horizons a bit.  I’ve got a book about the hero of Nioh, William Adams, and I’m trying out a murder mystery.  Still not sure if I like it better than IJ parker's Akitada yet, but it’s interesting.  The style is vastly different than my own, which gives the writer in me some…things to think about.

            I’ve spent a decent amount of time gaming, but that’s not really news.  I’ve been tired enough to stop and just go to bed early in places is the news.  But it’s part of life.  We’re all adjusting to new things going on, and for me, Saturday was hard just because I had to finish up my extra classes I’d taken on.  It was nice, I think the kids in them will have a good time traveling abroad, but the relief is having two weekend days again.  In other news, I took out a friend of mine to Yakiniku because he’s changing companies.  A bit sad, but we’ll hang out more, I feel certain.  He introduced me to beef heart and…may have to try more of that later.

            I had a restful day on Monday and a busy day on Sunday.  Sunday, I refilled my soda stocks, got a good pizza, and bought some more games and…sigh…amiibos.  Welcome to another thing I can collect, boys and girls.  Still, they’re good quality and very cool as decorations.  I’ve got enough self-control to limit my purchases to just what I want too, so…it’s fine, I’m sure it’s fine(it’s not fine.) I’m trying to get my energy back, but I have a lot of obligations forth coming.  Heading to Sendai to deal with immigration stuff on Tuesday, before work.  Also meeting my new colleague this week.  And it’s a house cleaning week, so there’s that.  Now, for what I promised in the title.  Picture time.

This little diorama was a huge surprise to me, but a welcome one.  It was in a package of cookies from Hakodate and...wow, it's great.  A poke out the paper pieces and make my own little city.  Awesome.

Next few are from New Years, my Takekoma shrine visit.  It's a beautiful shrine, but it was really crowded.  I just got some random photos.

Add another one to the pile of adorable barricades.  Here we have the noble panda in his native environment.  The snow.

I haven't bought too terribly many decorations.  A few hanging wall stuffs, but none of the Gatchapon or statues of my youth.  However, Amiibos are a thing and these statues are beautiful.  Along with my new Nintendo Switch, I have 5 Zelda amiibos for one of my new favorite games.  From back to front and left to right we have Mipha, Revali, Zelda, Urbosa, and Daruk.  The gang's all here.

A Fresh Start

A Fresh Start: March 6, 2018

            It’s been a while, hasn’t it?  Why now?  Well, you could say I was made an offer I couldn’t refuse…although, I could.  We all have choices.  Let’s perhaps say instead I was given the praise I have so often been missing in my life.  Not sure when updates will resume or how often, I’m leaning towards less due to how routine life can become.  But for now, let me give you the story thus far.

            Since December, I have been…very busy.  I took on some extra lessons for my city to teach some kids heading out to Australia for two weeks.  It’s easy enough work and reminds me of my time in China, with a similar ensemble style of teaching being employed.  It’s exhausting due to the odd hours but rewarding as well.  I feel a bit awkward doing it, but I feel awkward doing many things.  It’s not that different.  Life continued here in this tiny town without waiting for me.  I’ve been trying to catch up, in not so many words.  These new lessons mean my schedule of relaxing has been…chaotic.  I have had to cut down pizza and bath times greatly.

            On the flipside, I am enjoying some new things.  I continue to try new food and have found a winning combo of shitake alongside my usual fair when eating yakiniku.  My anxiety with teaching was high for a while, but as of now, it has settled.  I am still nervous, but I have been given encouragement that has helped me to relax, if only a little.  And, I have been busy here in town.  I have many things I want to do, but finding the will is hard.  I want to sleep a lot, but I also want to edit, read books, play games, and travel.  The latter has been the hardest.  With my weekends being cut in half, basically, I really just want to rest at home.  That ends this weekend, though.  Perhaps soon I can travel again.  I might enjoy that, if only for a day.

            My writing and my book continues on as it always has. It is slow but rewarding in its own way.  I struggle to sit down and write, despite the desire I have but always manage at least 2 hours most weeks.  The story is one I am proud of, though I do not know how others might feel.

            I have dealt with a lot of anger, in recent months. It’s something that exhausts me, to be honest.  Some of it is directed outwards, and some inwards, which leads to depression.  I have managed to cut a lot of that toxicity out of my system.  Much as I love Gwent, for example, it is not good for me.  It does not make me happy the way it used to. Being able to let go of the anger has been nice, but I am still lonely.  I have friends in town, but we’re all busy and even if we were not, I like my down time at home.  It’s a Gordian’s knot of unsatisfied feelings, some days.

            Enough of the maudlin crap, though.  I bought a Nintendo Switch.  I was waiting and waiting for a bit, but…well, let’s say that as much as I love Nier Automata, it wasn’t making me happy, it was very frustrating.  And as well designed as Culdcept Revolt is as a card game, the story bored me to tears.  So, I put both of those, and Gwent, aside and decided to splurge.  I bought a Switch and Zelda.  For that first week, I was the happiest I had been in months…maybe even years.  The beauty. The splendor.  The sheer unbridled fun.  The discovery…it was intoxicating.  Perhaps it’s good I finished it, as it can indeed be life consuming.  My opinion has cooled, but only slightly.  It is now my favorite Zelda game, despite a few small warts.  I also bought Mario Odyssey, Never stop Sneakin, and a few amiibos as part of this new wave of consumerism.  Why not?  For the first time in what feels like ages, I have the cash to do so.  The realization, the freedom, and the play have made me very happy.

            I caught up with Wakfu season 3 and some fan fics related to it.  It’s been nice, revisiting these old worlds and getting lost in the music and the splendor, alongside my new obsession, the Ancient Magus’s Bride.  I still have my love of Japanese culture and the enka that rotates around in my playlist is nice, as is my smooth video game jazz, but…there is something nice about these otherworldly things.

            That about brings us up to the present.  I have stressors and I am anxious about both a package I sent and one I am due to receive from the government, pertaining to me staying here.  However, I have faith it will work out, one way or another.  I have felt lighter, recently.  Perhaps it’s because of my haircut.  Perhaps I’ve just found a reason to smile again.  Work is easier, at least for today it was and my boss brought me thanksgiving microwaveable stuffing, which I have been craving.  I don’t know exactly how to feel in a lot of circumstances.  But life is good.  I don’t have any desire to return to the US.  Not until it gets its shit together.  For right now, Japan suits me fine.

            March will be a fresh start for me, in a number of ways.  I am hoping it is a sign of renewal.  I want to start dating again.  I want to travel more.  I want to, of course, keep writing and playing my games.  I want to show my family the world I have been so smitten with.  And I want to stride forward with some degree of certainty.  How much of that will happen?  I don’t know…but I’m going to keep walking.  See you in a bit.

Christmas Update

 Christmas update

Not sure if I’ll keep up with regular updates, but I feel that something should be said so that I don’t forget.  There’s still a lot of uncertainty in my life, however I’ve come to some interesting realizations.  For those who missed the memo, since my home is only insulated in my room, the kitchen and bathroom are freezing.  So, few people can understand the majesty of my cushioned and fur toilet seat that looks like a Scottish kilt.  Hehe, not even kidding, it’s really wonderful.

Now, trivial matters aside, I’ll say that I’ve felt more alive than I have in a damned long time.  Not entirely sure why, but I have my theories.  Part of it is that I’m getting back into something resembling a decent sleep schedule.  Part of it is that the Witcher 3, which, while fun, has been a life consuming endeavor, is almost over.  I’m almost finished with it.  And part of it is encouragement.

I’ve had good friends and family, people who want me to keep going, but professionally, I’ve seldom gotten the encouragement I needed.  I won’t really say much beyond that, but I feel positive about my work.  I may not be able to stay on for the next year, but regardless, I still feel good.  I’ve realized what I fear beyond most things is the unknown.  Having even some knowledge about how I’m doing is like a candle that I can focus on and it makes me feel good about life.  Which is, in a strange way, cyclical.  You feel good about yourself, you feel good about your work, you feel good in general.  It’s…nice.

I’ve realized my own realization over the last few days.  While I understand societal expectations, I feel that I am grossly out of practice. I know how to treat people, however the simple social niceties of life can often feel like a foreign language.  Still, I do my best and I’ve been given notes for how to improve.  And I will.  I have made mistakes in the past…I wish I could let them go though.  To move on, I mean.  Whatever happens, I am feeling optimistic and happy, regardless of how this journey ends.  I have a lot of plans in the future. Let’s see how they pan out.

Talked with an old friend from my China days recently.  She’s from the UK and has the snark and sass that I’ve often missed in life.  We had a good time catching up, but I am again reminded of how stunted I’ve been when it comes to social niceties.  She’s way better practiced at it.  Anyway, it was an interesting thought.  She had a rough patch with some of her work, but it does make me nostalgic for my time over in Beijing.  I will admit, however, that the nostalgia, I recognize, could prove to be a rose tinted bunch of nonsense, considering how China…can be a difficult place to adapt to.  I did it once though.  Maybe I’d do it again?  Japan will always be my first choice though.

Leading up to Christmas has been…difficult, to say the least.  I was fine the weekend before, but right before I started back at work, I got hit by a nasty case of Bronchitis. It got so bad that I couldn’t even drink or swallow on Wednesday, but thankfully, I was able to get to a doctor.  I got my medicine from him and the anti-inflammatory pills helped out immensely.  I was actually able to work that day, haha. It’s helped a great deal with the pain, but I’ve still been dealing with it for the whole week.

On a less terrible note, I got a very nice gift from a friend. He gave me a souvenir from Yamagata and it was frozen, yet microwavable burgers that were…just…amazing.  Wondrously delicious.  I wish I could buy them here in Natori, but no dice.  Still, a wonderful pair of meals for someone dealing with troubles.  It’s almost Christmas here, so I’m doing small updates and after Christmas day, this’ll get posted.  Alongside my friend, Gwent’s updated and I’m having way more fun with it, despite bugs, lag, disconnects, and other players being salty. Had to skip yakiniku though…I just feel too sick to and I don’t want the issues with my stomach.

My Christmas celebrations were…trying in a number of ways, but overall I still had a good time.  I spent Sunday doing a few errands, but some of them were fun and important for my enjoyment.  I got pizza and shopped for a few supplies, but most importantly, I bought a Christmas cake to celebrate the occasion.  I also talked with my family and struggled with a game.  You might wonder why that’s a point of contention, but the game, Christmas Nights, is a tradition for me.  My save data had been wiped and I couldn’t play, but fortunately, I found others with the same issues and backup saves online, so I was able to play my Christmas tradition game.  I smiled a lot this weekend.

Monday came and I got my KFC Christmas meal.  It was very good and I was happy.  I watched Saint Oniisan with it and I was happy.  I got a call from my school and had to cover for someone who got sick.  Not so happy anymore.  It felt like cruel irony, but I did it anyway.  Wasn’t as bad as I thought.  Everyone was kind to me and I didn’t have to cover a full day of classes, just a class for the young ones.  A few people, I know, might ask me the question, why not ignore the call or say you’re traveling or claim sickness(I am still recovering from Bronchitis and a cold, but that’s beside the point.) My answer is two-fold.  First, I am pathologically honest. When someone approaches me earnestly, I cannot lie to them, even for my own benefit.  It feels wrong. There is no honor in it.  The other answer is more…complex.  I remember watching the Overwatch Short, Honor and Glory.  There were a number of memorable lines there, but the one that resonated with me was, “I have been called. I must answer.” It’s just the way I’m wired. Honor can be a heavy burden, but I chose to bear it.  The world is a terrible place.  If I can make it a bit less terrible by answering the call for aid, then I will.  Always.  Even if I am tired or don’t want to, if I can walk, I must answer the call.  I don’t want others to suffer for my selfishness.  Life is unpredictable and these things happen.  I am a bit sad because when I got the call, I didn’t have much time to prep, so I probably looked tired and haggard.  An extra 30 minutes for a shower would have helped, but I needed to get there and get planning done.  So, I feel bad, I didn’t want my co-workers to worry about me.  I didn’t need to stay for a full day though, so I am counting it as a win, a Christmas present hidden within a trial.

This Christmas has been trying, as many of mine are, but I have had a good time.  It has been a good Christmas and I enjoyed it.  Smiled a lot this weekend.

November – December Update

 November – December update

It’s been a long ride so far.  I’m actually debating whether or not I should go back to updates, however I do feel that…something is needed.  So, let’s actually do a bit of recap.

From when last we left off, life has cooled a bit, but it’s been frustrating.  I have had trouble finding the soda that forms my lifeblood.  I’m managing, but…ugh.  I make do with Ginger Ale, Mountain Dew, and what Doctor Pepper I can scrounge, though that isn’t much.  Chips are going okay.  I’ve also been sick a lot recently, but I’m doing okay now.

People are marching to my door for contact, both in China and in the States.  It’s been nice reconnecting with friends and for the less tech savy, making it work.  I’ve had a bit of good times. Good times aside, I’m on a strange schedule.  The Witcher 3 helps, because it is so fun, though I have a lot of other games to work on. I have lost most of my editing time as I need to sleep extra before work to make up the deficit I’ve built up.  It’s frustrating.  I’ve had a chance for a trip to the mall to fix my coat, which was missing buttons, and I headed to the bath house as well. Also, I discovered a wonderful Japanese soup called Oden which is a great treat on a snowy day. It’s basically dashi broth with noodles, egg, daikon, and other goodies.

On top of the sleep deficit, I attended a Christmas party this Sunday, which is my day off.  Sigh.  I don’t want to be a curmudgeon, but holidays lose some of their meaning when I’m overseas.  It’s not quite the same as being at home, with the people you love.  I had to basically skip any semblance of Thanksgiving, save for talking about it with my students.  I do have a Christmas day meal ordered with the KFC.  Don’t laugh.  It looks pretty cool, and they did have pot pies of late that I’ve been pleased eat them. I will be doing my yearly tradition soon of Christmas Nights into Dreams.  It’s going to be quiet, joyful nostalgia.

The Christmas party itself was…fun, but very exhausting.  Wrangling children tends to be, haha.  They sure are cute and the activities we had were pretty cool overall.  I do still marvel at my boss, at times.  A mix between magician and drill sergeant who can control any situation.  I’m working on that myself.

If it sounds like not much has happened beyond what I’ve written above, that’s because not much has.  Some days are better than others.  Last week, I’ve been knocking it out of the park, more or less with, if not fun, then at least varied activities.  Ups and downs…that’s life. Still, I did get feedback on how to improve and I will strive to do just that.

Keeping things short because not sure what else really to say.  I’ve been surviving.  I enjoy my life for the most part.  I have everything I need here, though not quite everything I want.  Love would be nice.  But I’m not going to push too hard yet.

Hang, mister Vimes. I will hang.  Will I continue this journal?  Eh.  Maybe.  We’ll see.

Update:

So, I feel…I will continue the blog.  I’ll update this soon on my blog itself.  I don’t know what’s coming, which is a bit frustrating as my family and friends want to make plans, but life is nothing if not unpredictable.  Still, I feel I’ve been given a nice bit of perspective, recently, as well as some good vibes from friends.  This should be an okay, or hell, even a great Christmas.  Let’s see.

Bonus Update: Hokkaido Photos: Mt. Hakodate and Onuma Koen

The view from Mt Hakodate is a wondrous one indeed.  The journey up there was difficult and cramped and there were far too many people, but it is a spectacular sight, unlike most you can find in the world.  Like a bejeweled pick axe or double sided scythe.  The Onuma park was definitely another highlight as the nature around me was gorgeous. Then, I had to go home. So ends my journey and my photos.

Despite the huge number of people, the view from the top of Mt. Hakodate is breath taking.

This is my favorite shot.  It's like a pair of twin crescents back to back, forming the blade of a pickaxe or a double sided scythe that is Hakodate.

Onuma Koen was a beautiful park that I got to explore by boat before heading home.

Think I found the next mountain I want to visit.

Lots of pumpkins before the trip home.  You can see them all here. Halloween isn't much of a thing, but here in Onuma Koen, they have pumpkin carving.