June
18, 2019
When
I started this blog, I told people I would be honest about my feelings. I hate
that sometimes, because lots of bad things have happened, like a cascading
torrent down a water fall. Or, as my father says, when it rains, it pours. It’s
not all bad, in fact, the reason I’m even posting tonight is I was done a great
kindness. So, I want to say a thank you to someone who sent me a care package,
you know who you are, for picking up my spirits a bit
First,
the heat has arrived. Not as bad as I thought it would be, at least not all the
time, but these are still the early days of summer. The big problem I faced was
an invasion of insects into my house. I mean hundreds crawling around a window
I never use and had to tape up last year for this very reason. So, three weeks,
lots of duck tape, and spraying bug spray every day, and I’m prepared to say, I
won, but it was a stressful period.
Next
up, I am studying for the JLPT and it is stressful. I think I’m ready and doing
okay, at least as ready as I can be. I’ll be glad when it’s over in about three
weeks. I got my voucher in the mail today, so…everything’s in place.
The
last two cascades are…I think connected? Depression is a terrible cycle of where
you don’t want to do anything, but you get weaker because you’re not
exercising, so you don’t want to do anything. It’s worse with hemorrhoids. So,
yeah, I have them. Seeing a doctor, getting meds, first time for me so it’s a
bit strange, but…I have had to rest a lot. The stress leading up to this from
last month carried over to a degree, so I never got fully back on my feet and
now…it’s hard. To stand or sit, some days. It’s frustrating, but I’m trying not
to let it get me down. I am sad a lot, but there are things beyond my control,
like politics, that affect that. Trying to just keep on keeping on, mostly.
Enough
of that bad stuff. Good things? Good things. I got back into Magic the Gathering
and while originally, that was a cause of stress and late nights, I’ve gained a
smidge of self-control and been able to let go of losses and mostly just enjoy
the game, the lore, and the universe, like I did when I was a kid. Nostalgia
has been a bit painful at times, but ultimately good, I think. Revisiting some
of the works of Jim Henson to boost my spirits, and I never got to see Fraggle
Rock, so this is a perfect excuse. It’s good fun. I also found a tailor for my
coat. There was a hole in it and it…should be mended by Sunday? Fingers crossed.
My
students are great these days. Not always happy, as it is test season, but I’m
so proud of many of them for how far they’ve come. Others have risen out of the
new school year funk and are actually trying to have fun, which makes my job
easier. I have had to be stern with a few of them, but mostly, classes are
going well.
I’m always
grateful for the people who’ve tried to keep up with me, because in my life,
the experience is that it’s easy to forget your wayward friend. And to the
person who gave me my care package, I must give my eternal thanks…though,
Facebook thanks are coming soon. I got so much mac and cheese to make once I’m
healthy again, haha. Final thoughts are that I want to be healthy and have a
bit of normalcy in my life for a bit. It would be nice. I’m making due and playing
a few games to help me relax, but I’m honestly less inclined to play so much
these days.
I
miss my girlfriend a good bit. I was sick and cuddling with her was nice when
she was here. I knew it’d be tough when she was gone back home, but even with
the contact we’ve had, it remains a bit difficult for me to forget all the
huggings and journeying. I miss you.
And
with that, I’ll end. Hopefully next month will bring better things. I had to
take a lot of time off my book due to sickness, but it is finished and so are a
few one shots, so I hope I can get back to editing and maybe a bit of
recreational reading soon.
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