Working in China Month 4: December 2014

Delays, delays, I got a new job and work to do and I forget things, but better late than never.  Here, near to Halloween, let's talk about my Christmas in China.

December 2014:

December 1
Today was the teacher's forum.  God, I nearly killed myself since all the activities were physical.  Ballet was very strenuous, since I don't bend well, but I tried hard for my co-worker who was hosting it.

I gave up about halfway through the workout because my body simply refused to do all that they wanted.  I got through squats, lunges, sit ups, and dozens of other exercises, but enough was enough.  Decent free lunch...first burrito in China.  I thought they were a myth.  Pity the veggies on it were so bad.

I got to be a DM in a DnD game as part of an activity, which was cool, and I got to present my video games as a useful tool for education program.  I have to admit, I don't think people were that impressed, but I was tired and I didn't care.  I muddled through the technical difficulties to try and get it done so I could go home, which I did.  Now, one more day of forum and then I have my weekend.

So tired.

December 2-4
Now...funny story...except not really...I went to the forum again and was run ragged...again, and decided after it was over to go through a bit of a search for donkey meat, of which I have been informed, there is a store in my neighborhood.  Donkey meat, for those who are not aware, is delicious and has to be tasted to be believed.  Now, I didn't find my donkey meat, I had to settle for Mcdonalds and go home.

However, after going home, I awoke the following morning to an insane amount of pain in my extremities, which persisted for the following days.  Worse, after dragging my body out of the house for Pizza, I found myself around 6pm, sick to my stomach and nauseated, with a migraine and a desire to vomit topping off the pain in my arms and legs.  And for six hours, that's how I lived...laying in my bed, praying for the sweet oblivion of sleep.

I got slightly better the next day, but my weekend was a hell, followed only by frustration of having to go to work.

December 5
Fun fact, know that China's computers are old?  Mine crashed 3 times today in 30 minutes.  It's an old Dell clunker running windows XP.  God, how can such an advanced country be so backwards, I wonder...it amazes me.  Top it all off with another 12 hour day, six classes over my basic five, and my internet mocking me when I came home, and I am ready to just go to sleep and enjoy the sweet nothingness of my pillow and my bed...noticing a theme here, are we?

December 10-12

I spent my time this weekend building a Christmas special for the family and lamenting over the fact that the job search never really ends, it just slows up.  Already thinking about what may happen when I have to return home.  It would be great to go home to a decent paying job, a solo apartment, and a chance to get back to normal with life, do more exercise, write more, etc. but...when we leave for another country, it is foolish to think that things will stay the same.

Nevertheless, I'll have to begin my job search anew in April.  Fun stuff...how tiresome.  I'll need to rebuild my resume and begin dealing with the issue of contacts again, alongside having to get my paralegal cert renewed, in case I can find work as a paralegal.  Just thinking about it at this point makes me tired and a bit irritable, so trying not to.

My computer problem has been fixed at work, but work is still exhausting and I feel a bit worn down.  I feel it is from the lack of my usual futon couch to sleep on, which is a comfort for me, and due to the lack of those I love being near me, in particular my friends whom I feel understand me just a touch more than others.

It is a trial of living abroad we must all accept if we want to broaden our horizons.

December 17

After the joy that is talking with my cousin, one of my favorite people in the world, my internet decided that I was having too much fun and crapped out.  You know, every damn weekend, it's something.  Either I have too much work to do, or I'm sick or SOMETHING, but I can never just have two perfect days.  Something has to happen to piss me off.  And when I say the internet has crapped out, I mean something in my wireless router or my damned internet connection has BLOWN, meaning I may not have internet for DAYS, since I have to work and will not be home until the following Monday.  Screw all kinds of China for its internet.  China's internet, and I do not say this lightly, is worse than the U.S.'s.  Both in speed and customer service.

December 18

I think I've realized why I get so angry and emotional when the internet is disconnected.  Being in China or being in the states, it is...a disconnect.  You are suddenly disconnected from the entire world around you, and especially from your loved ones.  Even if you don't want to talk to anyone or watch anything...you have the power to and that makes you feel connected.  Like you have the option to talk to others.  Being in China, even a few hours of disconnect with no promise of renewal hits me quite hard because I feel truly alone.  I cannot talk to my family, or my cousin, or my friends.  I cannot look for solutions for problems I have online or watch videos others create for fun.  I cannot even express my thoughts online, for people who want to or do not care to see.  And to be that alone in a country which you do not speak the language well and are...frankly dealing with a lot of stress in...that disconnect can be crippling.

I miss everyone more than ever now and feel very tired and very worried.  What if I cannot get it reconnected in time for Christmas?  I will miss...everyone.  I will spend the holiday alone.  Truly alone.  Tis a terrifying and depressing thought.  Here's hoping my agent pulls through, since I can do jack squat to get this fixed.  It's in her hands.

December 19

Frustration is pretty common here.  My headphones died and I had to get new ones.  Spending more than I want to, but in China it's easy to feel like you're spending more than you are.  I got new headphones, with a mic, with more features than my old ones, for less than what I paid for stateside.  Funny thing is, a store wanted to sell me basically the same set for close to 1200RMB, or 200 dollars American.  Why?  Branding.  Screw that crap.  You gotta know where to look if you want decent quality at a good price.  I got my headphones at my local BHG fresh grocery store.  They sell a little of everything for a decent price.

It's also where I've been scarfing down my peanut butter chocolate bars because good god, those things are amazing.  One of many things I may miss when I go home.  I get 24 bars for less than 5 bucks.  A bargain if ever I heard of one.

Lots of bargains here in China actually.  However, still waiting for my internet to be fixed.  Updates on when this solitude of mine ends as they come.

December 20
Thank god, I finally have my internet back.  Like 10 minutes before I had to go to work, the internet guy comes to fix my system.  Takes like 5 minutes...some things are the same in both America and China.

Also, after a hard day of teaching, I spent my subway ride home discussing literature and arguing with two Chinese girls about why Twilight is bad.  Good day?  Pretty fun stuff...I feel bad whenever I can't remember names though.  I keep trying to work on that, but still...hard.  I have a lot of students.  I know maybe...30-40 by name by now?

December 22

So very tired and a bit jaded.  I spent most of the day shopping for gifts for others and frankly, China's traditional malls can go right to hell.  First, I had to ride the worst subway in the world, Line 5, and nearly suffocate from lack of space.  This was both ways, so I spent a good hour or two on my feet shoulder to shoulder with a few hundred people.  Then, when I get to a mall I find they are far less the shrines to greed that I thought and more a shrine to pretension and status.

See, a traditional mall in China focuses almost entirely on proving how wealthy, well off, or high up on the food chain you are.  40% of the stores sell things which you put on, to show the world how expensive your tastes are when you are out in public.  20% sell things you take home, like expensive art pieces or statues, that show how well off you are when people visit your home.  And the last 30% are restaurants that, just by eating there, you show off how much money you have.  A single piece of clothing at a traditional mall can run into the hundreds or even the thousands.  And I don't mean RMB.  I mean dollars.  There is no variety there.  Clothes, jewelry, and expensive art stuffs are pretty much all you can get.  And the prices will give most people a heart attack.

If you want any variety, you have to find specialty stores.  I went to three malls and was bored stupid.  I went to one book store and was pretty much amazed beyond words.  At a single book stores I found: Chinese books, English books, models, calligraphy material, art decor, clothing, video games, movies, tools for composition, and so much more.  It was a large book store, admittedly, but it had just so much more to offer than any of the damn malls.

That, however is a traditional mall in China.  We have the...less traditional ones too.  These are magical places.  Think a bazaar, with people lining the streets with whatever they've bought, made, or are selling for others, now put them inside and in a six story building.  It's cool how modular it is, so the stalls can be swapped out or altered for holidays, seasonal stuffs, or easily replace someone who couldn't make it.  They have screens for keeping your goods private if you want it and everyone pretty much walks around trying to make a living.  Eating their lunch while selling a tennis racket for 40RMB.  The goods here are insanely cheap and a very good value.  I found stores selling sports good, bedding, clothing, holiday supplies, mending clothes, selling school goods and selling anime supplies all on one floor.  There is so much variety.

I bought plenty of gifts, both for myself, and for some friends, at one particular store which had an affinity for Japan.  I spent altogether less than 100 dollars for 2 gifts for me, 2 gifts each for three of my friends, food for the day, and for a mend job on my shirts.

That's another thing, I found an amazing tailor.  If I ever get holes in my clothes, I am going back to her to get repairs.  I showed her my shirts with a hole, we did some sign language to understand mending the hole, I gave her the equivalent of 4 dollars, and within 10 minutes I had 2 expertly mended shirts.  Fantastic work on them, too.  My favorite malls are the nontraditional ones.  Screw that expensive pretentious crap the regular ones offer.

December 25-26

Christmas was okay.  Bit lonely, but I got some time to rest and I got to see my family before I finally had to head back to work.  Not much else to say.

December 27
It amazes me how some people simply fail at giving constructive feedback.  If I make a mistake, I expect to be called on it, yes.  However to have someone treat you like you are 5, demean and humiliate you, even in private, and to treat you like you are of no real worth, save for the pretention to caring which is obviously they don't...yeah...learn feedback better.

I have colleagues who have given me good, constructive feedback, but some of them have major issues with it.  Significant issues.

I could care less.  I don't like it, but I continue on.  I will either not get fired, meaning I have experience, money, and time where I am not leeching off the family, or I will get fired and I can go home and see the people I love.  Either way, life continues.  I won't get fired at this point though...I feel that too much time has been put into me to fire me just for needing work.  A screw up of major proportions that is seriously bad, maybe, but I've already been working for almost 4 months...bit late to want me out, so no matter how frustrating the criticism, I will continue on.

December 30

Went to the lama temple today.  It's...an interesting place.  A bit more solemn and somber than other tourist spots.  You get incense when you go in and can burn it all at once or just burn a little as you go back, from Bodhisattva, to teacher and Buddhist founder, to a giant statue of the Buddha in the back of the temple, alongside a shrine to lady Guan-yin, the Bodhisattva of compassion.  The air is thick with incense smoke and it feels...very humbling, actually.  I know much of Buddhism, but here, seeing all the history, the tantric entities, and the teachings of it in China, I realize how little I do know.  It's very humbling...turns a man meek at times, I think.  It was a nice experience, I think, as many of the relics are quite beautiful and the temples have a certain air about them.  I admit that I don't have many pictures because it was requested that people do not.  Out of reverence for the Buddha and respect for the rules, I chose not to, even if others did.

I also went to visit the Imperial college and the temple to Confucius.  I learned a great deal about the scholar's life and about the college systems of the old Chinese empire.  It was quite educational.  I also nearly broke down crying because of nostalgia and want after seeing some brush paintings.  It made me realize all that I miss.  The girl I loved so long ago in Japan, the paintings I wish I could still create, and all those dear to me back home.  Still, I collected myself and finished exploring.  There was much to see and much to learn.  My legs hurt, but it was quite an enlightening experience.

Before I headed to a mall to look for some gifts for some anime crazy friends of mine, I spied, in a tiny little cafe, a doctor pepper.  Three different flavors, in fact.  Perhaps the only ones in China.  Though the price was jacked up, I bought all three and will take one each night for the next three to savor the taste.  I miss home...and those drinks are as close to home as it gets.

I really do miss home.  Be that Japan or be that North Carolina, I miss it.  China has been good to me, at times.  Despite frustrations with work, I've found good food and met decent people, and even those who cannot understand my words, I have a kinship with because I can buy their food or their wares and we are closer, in a sense.  China has been good...but I do not know if I can call it home.  I've got more time before I need to make a choice about staying or going, but for now, I still believe I will go when the time comes.

December 31

I want to take a moment before the year ends to talk a little about poverty here in China, specifically, begging.  Recently, the subway fare rose and many people found themselves unable to take it due to this and I find that a bit unfair.  It hurts the economy to do such things, because it makes the poor less mobile and less able to find work.

That is something I tend to respect most in certain people.  The drive to continue, despite having very little.  To put what skills they have to use for profit.  As the Joker said, if you're good at something, never do it for free.  And this also brings me to one of the more depressing and frustrating stances I've had to adopt here in China.

There are A LOT of beggars here.  Most hide out in Subway stations where they know people will be coming by and...frankly, I have a certain degree of distaste for them.  Not because they are poor or because of how they dress, because we all dress in our means and live as best we can, but because of their lack of drive.  There are two kinds of beggar in China.  There are those who will try and earn your money by offering a service, such as playing their Zitar, often homemade, on the way to the subway, or by selling things, or what have you, and then there are those who walk around, or in some cases sit around, and expect hand outs due to them either being in someway weaker or in their opinion unable to work.  I...have an issue with this.  At first I wanted to help as many as I could, in fact I gave to a couple who went through a subway with a speaker begging from everyone because they seemed badly off. Then they appeared the next day.  And the next.  And the next.  Then it hit me.  This was their job...to beg for charity.  It...kind of irks me, because in the States I've seen people with the homeless signs or the "god bless, my house got burned down" signs...and some of them with those signs stay at the same street corner day in and day out, working it as if they own it, thinking others should pay a toll.  Some beggars make enough money to put even my earnings to shame...and I have an issue with this.

I know I should not judge, but for me, working and supporting myself is a matter of pride and some just seem to have given up on that, expecting to be paid because they seem or feel they are worse off.  I tend to think that, even if you have no one there for you, you can do something.  We can all do something, even if it's just selling flowers or fruits on the corner.  And those who try to offer something, to make money off what they're good at, I have great respect for.  It's why I love the food vendors because they are using their skills to make money, even if it's just a little.  They cook for you.  But the beggars who expect charity...I don't know anymore.  The government seems to be equally divided on the issue as well, because they try to discourage this...in fact, a part of me wonders if the subway fare rose because of these kinds of incidents, where people "work" a specific subway, hours on end, for money.  After all, you pay 2RMB, now 3-6RMB and just stay on the subway till quitting time just collecting alms.  It's warm, it's got music, and there's plenty of people to increase the odds of you getting paid.

I know, more than you might think, what it is to need help.  But I have always strove to live with pride and to stand on my own when I could.  I want to help others stand on their own, I will gladly support a vendor or a seller or a maker or even a street musician because they work for their money.  It may be unfair to put my ideas of life onto another situation, but...if you give a man a fish he has food for a day, but tomorrow he will starve.  If you teach a man to fish, he will have food for a lifetime.  I believe that's the saying.  I know this stance may not be the most popular, but...there was a time when I gave to as many hard luck cases as I could...then I learned that they made more money begging on the street than I did working in an office...enough to pay rent for a house at times.  It...jades you.  That's not an excuse, but seeing the same thing day in and day out in China, with people holding out their hands rather than trying to create something...it is frustrating at times.  Even more so than in the U.S.

We cannot save everyone, even if we want to.  And even if we could...what will they do when we are gone?

2014 has been good to me in many aspects, but I've also found it terribly depressing in others.  Lost a lot of people I care about and had to go through some really trying times.  I'm praying 2015 will be better.

I'll have more for you as it develops in the new year.

Working in China, Month 3: November 2014

Apologies for the delay, everybody.  My life has been super mega hectic lately with promises, job searching, JET applications, and MOVING...so I've neglected this blog and am a few days late.  Either way, here's my account of my experience in China for the month of November, 2014.  Hope you enjoy.

November 2014:

November 1-4

Finally got paid!  I feel like a real adult now, haha.  It's nice to see that I've finally got money and will likely be able to support myself.  School is going well, the students in particular make my heart sing a little with how energetic and supportive they can be.  The long commute is wearing on me though.

Some things that need to be mentioned though would be what I've gotten used to in some stores.  Seems like the expiration date on food in some places is...purely a suggestion.  I've not gotten sick from eating things yet, however it is head scratching/eyebrow raising.  I'm going to begin work on creating a guide for living in China soon.

Also, I was invited to present at a teacher's forum, however I can choose the subject.  Video games as a tool for education it is!

November 10-12

Ugh...god...sick again.  China really hates me being well, doesn't it?  I've tried to keep myself healthy and watch what food I eat, but I still get screwed hard.  And the weather is getting cooler and I'm unsure about how to turn on my heat and my drinking water supply is beginning to run low.  Life's just fun and dandy here in China.

Sigh...I've got my leave set up and hoping to spend some time with people over the next few weeks.  Got a big test coming up that I have to take in order to keep working at my school and it's, surprise surprise, on one of my days off.  Please kill me now.

Life isn't as bad as I'm making it out to be.  I passed my probationary period and I'm a full time employee now with access to my leave, so I have a few holidays coming up.  Gonna try and skype family and friends during that time.  Plans for a Thanksgiving dinner with other teachers and possibly meeting a friend of my mom and doing some short touring.  Plans are being made and I'm also working on getting my presentation ready for the teacher's forum.

School alternates between being grueling and rewarding, trying to keep my language, prep work, and speed of my voice in line with the level of my learners and at times, I hate going to work.  However, every time I get asked for help or just have the students shooting the breeze with me, it all seems worth it.  Even got in on a few board games lately, which is one thing we do to have the students practice English.  It's fun and it's a good way to help them relax.

Very tired and jaded by my illness, but life goes on, as they say.  And so must I.

November 15

Well, I went back to work this week after my illness only to discover I had a performance review!  Joy...god, I am sick of that.  I keep having to get observations, performance reviews, and the general feeling I'm being watched, even after I completed probation.  I get why, because this is a business and people need to make sure I'm doing my job, but still...

It's not coming at the best time, you might say.  I'm getting a presentation ready for the teacher's forum, on video games as an educational tool, and I'm getting ready to take the Teacher Knowledge Test, which frankly makes me sad because it's a ton of work in the midst of a ton of work.  I also need a flu shot to avoid being sick AGAIN, and I have to prepare something for Thanksgiving soon.  Still trying to balance my videos that I make in my spare time, keeping this journal, writing, and creating a guide to living in China.

I barely have time to game, much less sleep, anymore.  It's...frustrating.  Hoping things get better soon, because I'm so tired right now.  Work is still fine, I enjoy it, but it IS work.  Something to remember.

Fun fact: Chinese people will avoid getting on a train if it's at the terminal if there are no seats.  I've seen people stand and wait, not getting on a subway or train, even if only the seats are taken, just so they don't have to stand on the ride.  That kinda patience is beyond me.  I have things I need to do.  This is only at a terminal, mind you, when there will be another empty train coming...but still, that's a good 10 minutes of waiting just to get a seat you might get anyway 1-2 stops later if you got on the train and stood...

Also, Chinese men of varying ages seem to have a weird fad about growing out the fingernail on their pinky finger.  Not sure what the deal is with that, but it's happened enough for me to notice it so...there we are.

November 18

I thought I was over my sickness, but like a gut punch it crawled back.  Still trying to feel better.  Medicine has cost me, though not much by American standards.  About 17 dollars worth.  Still, finances are a big concern for me, among other things.

Glad I have some time off.  Work is frustrating, even when it is fun.  Just because of all the things in flux that need to happen at the same time.

November 19
I continue crashing on Wednesdays.  Been having this issue for a while now where I just need to take a long nap in the middle of the day, maybe to catch up on sleep, maybe to prepare for what's to come, I don't know.

My agent came to visit me today and helped me work out some maintenance issues with my door, set up my heating, and showed me how to refill my water cooler.  She's an awesome lady.

That aside, most of the day has been dedicated to getting my presentation ready for the teacher's forum.  It's taking a lot of time and work, but no more than my usual videos, so I know I can do it...it's just tiresome.

November 20-23

Apparently, part of being in a large organization, with human beings instead of employees, is that they want you to be happy and get along with other people.  This means, we have team building.  What is team building you may ask?  Ohhhhhhhh, just my company willing to buy me lunch at a fancy Chinese group restaurant where everyone buys something and we all share.  Amazing.

I had to pay nothing for all this fancy food, too.  I got to eat fish head, cheese scallops, egg and spinach, bread ice cream cake thingies, tamales made of stir fry, spicy potatoes...all sorts of good stuff.  Granted, this is not an every week thing.  This is a, "We have a little extra budget and we wanna be nice to our employees because we are nothing without them," thing.  I kinda love that.  Some companies will order pizza for their employees?  Some take them out to the fancy stuff.  I work hard.  My work is stressful.  But it's nice to know that I'm worth more than a $10 pizza, you know?

Speaking of that, we also have team building after work.  The previous event happened during, but I also, two days later, got to go to a fancy Chinese buffet, where everyone, from the sales team, to the teachers, to the bosses, were all hanging out, drinking, shooting the breeze...I gorged myself on sushi, deep fried tempura, turtle soup, a variety of meat, and chocolate coated cakes, due to there being a chocolate fountain.  Granted, I get wary at events like this cause I do not drink(as the drinks were gratis), so the rowdier others get, the more I tend to raise an eyebrow, but I'm not the only sober one so I don't have to deal with it alone.

On top of all that, I tend to keep finding interesting people in my students and colleagues.  People who are interested in my Japanese or even my topics for enrichment classes.  And I love it.  People interested in Dragonology or video games as educational tools.  There are some nice rewards beside money or food for working here.

November 24
Ever have that time where you think the world is screwing with you because after one great thing happens, a ton of shit happens?  Lemme lay it down for you.  Trying to do another social event, Thanksgiving, but the instructions I was given on how to get to the VERY OUT OF THE WAY BAR were so poor that I spent two hours looking for it in weather so cold that, despite my heavy coat, I could see my breath.  I was also carrying two cheesecakes due to this being a potluck.  The kicker?  I didn't find the place.  It got so late, cause this was after work, that I had to go back to the subway station or risk missing my last train.  I have the cakes still, so that'll be a treat, but...spent a fair bit of money and wasted my time.  Good god...I got so angry I went from angry/passive aggression to just depressed and apathetic with a little snippy.  It happens when you get so angry you pass from furious to manic laughing idiocy to just being tired.  And I am tired.

I should not try to be social when it is planned by people who do not get that an out of the way bar with instructions printed from someone's crappy phone is a bad idea.  Or maybe I shouldn't be social.  I think the world is laughing at me for having so much fun and saving money on dinner the last few days, so I am being punished with wasted time and money.

The world can kiss my butt.  Black Friday is not the only nightmare people experience in Thanksgiving.  They also face being lost, in an unknown part of a town in China, trying to find a bunch of foreigners who want to get drunk, eat turkey, and party in an out of the way bar.  I realized near the end of my odyssey that I did not even want to do this.  I thought it would be fun...I was wrong.  Even if I had found that bar, I bet it wouldn't have been that great...I really should just accept that sometimes...sometimes it's nice to just come home from work sunday night, day before your weekend, and just veg out.

November 25
Let me just get this out of the way.  Remember how I said Chinese people were patient?  Apparently, only when they're going home.  I literally saw a woman push through the line on a full subway and try to cling to the outside of the subway so she could get where she was going.  Needless to say, I took a different subway.  There, that said, let's get to the good stuff.

My family had been encouraging me and giving me correspondence of another American they knew who would be in Beijing and the stars aligned and we got to meet today.  She was around my mother's age.  Somewhat similar temperament, but a bit more independent, spiritually in tune, and not my mom, haha.  We got to know one another over small talk and with our guide, Miss Sha, we headed to the Forbidden city.  I got harassed by salesmen, but stuck to my guns and only bought some discounted post cards and a book of some of Chairman Mao's quotes.  People may sneer or roll their eyes, but the man was a great philosopher if nothing else.  His thoughts on the expanding of education and the metaphors used were quite engaging.  I think it will be an interesting read.  Haggled down to 30% of the original asking price, too.  Felt good about that.

Anyway, we headed to the forbidden city, did some photograph taking, and got a history lesson on symbolism, like the amount of animals present on a roof indicated status, as well as history and usage of the buildings before the birth of the Chinese republic.  Our guide was very kind and loved small talk just as much as me and my mom's friend, so we all talked and had a good time.  It was bitterly cold, though for me it was nice.  My friends were a bit...put out by it.  Nevertheless, we survived, took a quick lunch, I introduced my mom's friend to Wang Lao Ji, which is a tea soda, and she loved it.  We climbed to the temple of heaven and did a bit more sight seeing before the summer palace.

I had to get up early to meet my mom's friend, so I napped on the way, as we had a driver.  So tired this week, especially with the TKT tomorrow.  We saw less of the summer palace than I did during my trip, but I saw a few new things and we had a good time walking down the long corridor.  I need to remember to send my mom's friend information on the paintings of the men in the fields and the weavers in the summer palace so she can google them.

After the tour, my mom's friend and I walked, talked, and got a traditional dinner, family style.  We got a delicious orange beef and onion dish, a strange but enjoyable set of ribs, very tasty lamb and cabbage dumplings, and celery and lotus buds in garlic sauce.  Very tasty and all for under 25 dollars.

We hit up some shops, talked Discworld, religions, and family, and overall had a good time.  While I hated the subway and was very tired by the end of the day, I had enjoyed myself and my company and it was a good time to be sure.  A nice change from the Thanksgiving debacle and a nice buffer since I have to deal with the TKT tomorrow.

November 26

The TKT can go right to hell.  God, I hated it.  2 hours of transport, 1 hour of waiting, getting lost, and tearing my palm open on the side walk, 50 minutes of one very stupid test.  That was my day today.  Friggin hell that was pointless.

November 27-30

God...been watching my hand and worrying about infection, but it seems okay.  Ugh...these schedule changes I keep getting really screw with me.  I've had to deal with starting 12 hour days on fridays...yeah...and peer observations.  Yes again.  And above all else, dealing with the pain in my hand and the lack of sleep and the worry of the teacher forum.

I actually had to re-edit my final presentation because the stupid old computers we use couldn't recognize MP4 files so I had to convert all my videos to WMV and then re-upload them into my PPT presentation.  God...

Got my first taste of peanut butter in months and it was like a taste of heaven.  My mouth was screaming in ecstasy and I had to buy a whole box.  So, that was my splurge for the week.  less than $5 worth of peanut butter and chocolate candy bars.

Another social event and team building exercise.  We headed to a restaurant called Carnival which featured decent dancing by the staff, all you can drink soda, a decent buffet with nothing more exciting than a fish on a stick, but with really good meat, and with absolutely abysmal sweets.  Now, sleep needed before December rolls around and we get to the teacher's forum.  Pray for me.

 

Working in China, Month 2: October 2014

October 2014

October 1-3

This has been the Chinese national holiday.  Considering how hard work has been, I took most of the days off.  Just stayed in and got settled.  Also, got invited to a food trek with my co-workers.  Food trek, you say?  Basically, we went to some adventurous eating sites that the veteran teachers knew of.  I had pig stomach, intestine, and lung, donkey meat sandwiches, fried dough that is basically oil stuck in honey, called sweet ears, boiled dumplings full of cheese, beef, and carrots, and fried dumplings with beef, cheese, and shitake mushrooms.

Overall, good stuff, but my stomach and my legs are quite tired.  Pity I go back to work in the morning.

October 4-8

Not much to say, really.  I'm starting to get into a routine of work, come home, get my holidays.  Still sorting out a few things, like my fapiao which is a tool for getting a tax break, my water cooler, and the like.  But, I just taught this week.  Had some good classes, had some bad ones, but this is just life now.

Soooooooo, to pad out this entry, let me share two things I've noticed about China.  First, while everyone likes to point the finger at China and the Chinese government about their censorship or oppression, my time here, and indeed this is backed up by my colleagues, has been among the safest anywhere.  Crime is...kind of alien to China.  Or at least your typical crime, like open robbery, assault, or the like.  My co-workers mention there is the occasional pick pocket, or that any crime done will be done in such a way that you don't notice it, because being noticed is very harsh, however on the whole...nothing.  This is due to two things, in my opinion.  The first is harsh punishments.  I know little of Chinese law, but I believe selling weed here is punishable by death.  Yeah, they don't screw around with crimes here.  The other is the security.  Will the police or the guards at buildings or subways help you if you're assaulted?  Hell if I know.  However, the fact that they are there creates a psychological feeling of being watched or monitored that kind of discourages crime.  Think about it.  People feel free to offer death threats online when their name is hidden, but unless you are drugged out of your mind, most people will not risk such things if they don't think they can get away with it.  And with so many people, theoretically in a security or power position, monitoring you...you won't risk that.  So, yeah, save for the threat of being run over by the insane car drivers, Beijing is crazy safe.

The other thing I've noticed about China is the cooking.  Not sure I'm a fan.  Chinese cooking focuses on using every part of an animal, right down to hooves or bones in soup to flavor.  It's environmentally cool, but at the same time, this creates an odd situation.  Chicken breast, for example is very cheap because there is so much meat and what have you.  Chicken FEET or a chicken's NECK are much more expensive, because there is only one per chicken and there is so little there to eat.  It's...weird.  A duck tongue is more expensive than a duck leg or breast.  Even if it tastes worse or there is less to eat.  It's the delicacy factor.  The other thing is that there are an insane amount of spices used in Chinese cooking.  Even on the street, where they have little more than a stove to cook their food on, the Chinese love their sauces, their garnishes, and their pastes which they use as marinade.  Peanut, pepper, and savory sauces are the most common.  For me, this can get a little silly.  I remember one hot pot dish I got, the seller wanted to garnish it with something like relish, beans, hot sauce, on top of the soup itself, and the taste was just...blehhh...I got pizza that night instead.  Sometimes it is very tasty.  Sometimes it's just not.  Anyone coming to China, be prepared for all the spices and be prepared to see weird foods you'd never want sold at higher prices.

October 9-13

Got chewed out for the first time this week.  Yeah, I feel great.  Just work and trying to survive.  My time in China has kinda let me in on something I didn't think of when I was in the states.  When you have to work for a living and your every free moment is precious...you are not a sight seer.  You have less desire to go out and experience the world around you because you've seen it...you work in it.  And it chews you up and spits you out again.  Right now, my goal is survival.  Not getting fired, which everyone assures me is pretty much not gonna happen, but still...not dying of smog inhalation, we'll get to that, and basically trying to enjoy life as best I can.

Plans to go sight seeing.  We'll see if they become more than just plans.  I want to survive, not have a bunch of pictures to share.

Speaking of smog...I woke up one morning and a cloud of mist so thick I could not see the buildings out of my window had descended on the city.  And stayed around for three days straight.  I went out wearing a mask, duh, but the air was so thick...good god.  Yeah, Beijing has a smog problem.  Was even worse today.  Apparently, so much pollution was in the air not only was P.E. cancelled in other schools, but also...it was off the charts of what they keep track of.  The concentration of pollution, at 500, is about "oh god my lungs are burning" and yeah, we were beyond that.  Doubt I'll end up living here for more than my contract.

And when it's not smog, it's wind.  Wind can take the smog away.  Know what else it can take away?  The internet.  Not even kidding.  We have internet loss due to high winds.

I live a charmed life here.

October 18

Reason I haven't posted everyday or recorded something is there's not much new to say.  Been working.  HOWEVER, I got home tonight to discover a card shoved under my door that I think is advertising some sort of illicit sexual act, as it had a nearly nude woman with those come hither eyes.

Needless to say, I made sure the business card had an intimate relationship with the trash can.

And more smog.  Yay.

October 21
Welp, the smog has cleared up so I'm trying to go sight seeing at least once or twice a month.  I was told that the summer palace is the must see for autumn/spring so I decided to give it a look.

It also gave me an excellent excuse to try Modern Toilet.  A restaurant where everything is bathroom themed.  I sat on a toilet to eat ice cream and fried rice shaped like turds, while urinals lined the wall.  Only in Asia.  Once you get over the initial shock of it, the food is decent, if a bit average.  The shock is what you go there for.

Anyway, back to the summer palace.  Was immediately turned off by it due to the fact that they wanted a regular entrance fee and extra fees for the "special sections" of the palace, like the Wechang gallery of artifacts or the Buddha's incense tower.  Me, being poor as of this moment, I had to go with the cheaper option.  So, I'm walking along, there's plenty of people, I have my music blaring, and a funny thing happens.  I start having a good time.

I start to feel like I felt in Japan, in communion with nature.  Appreciating the beauty, but still wrapped in the warmth of my technology.  I see the old and natural and I love it while appreciating the new and artificial.  I really, REALLY liked the summer palace, even without the super special ticket.

So, first I just wandered around.  Saw a gate dedicated to Guan Yu, a warrior hailed as a deity in China, saw a marble boat used for pleasurable gatherings by Empress Cixi, the dowager who nearly ruined China during the Boxer Rebellion, and...then I just went the path less traveled by.  No guides, no maps, just walked away from the crowds and found myself at peace.  Bear in mind, the summer palace is HUGE.  There were lots of crowds, but it's a huge tract of land, housing special buildings, temples, galleries, and the like.  So, I managed to find some relatively peaceful places to enjoy a few grapes, Chinese tea soda, and just get to thinking.

Favorite place was where drawings and carvings of farming and weaving had been recreated, though a close second was the garden of harmonious delights, where there was quite a collection of Chinese brush painting.  Sumi is something I dearly love and it made my heart ache to paint again...to see life breathed into the world with just a simple black brush.

I walked a huge distance, as, being poor, I could not afford to take the boats to speed up my trip.  Besides, I needed the exercise, so it was fine.  I got to thinking about video games, particularly the ones I left at home.  Next time, they come with me, I think.  I also got to thinking about lots of other things.  Love the water of the huge lake in the palace due to a game of mine and got time to appreciate the beauty, as the sun glittered off the surface.  Love bridges.  To me, they're representative of bonds.  Friendship and connections to others.  They mean a great deal to me.  Even if I may not always use them, I enjoy the view, of the world around and of the bridge itself, knowing I have a place to stand.

Did a fair bit of souvenir shopping too, for various people.  I may have been poor, but the prices were too low to resist.  I tried my hardest to find peace here and almost found it.  I saw a great Buddha and bodhisattva set and climbed many tall hills.  I was reminded of Japan and the love I had and lost while there.

Eventually, I think I came to realize why I've had such trouble adapting to China.  See, I love Asia.  Feudal/ancient Asia.  I love the design, the history, the culture...Japan had that in spades.  Even among the modern buildings, there were reminders of its past and history.  Small shrines dotting the street, old, time tested building design, plenty of nature mixed in with industry.  At least where I stayed.  In Beijing, though, there's none of that.  To visit the summer palace was like an oasis in a desert, as it was all the old ways, the old culture, the old world, surrounded by the modern, the progressive.  And it really is an oasis.  There's not much else around.  In my own area, there is practically nothing that reminds of the old...and that saddens me greatly.  It's a city without a connection to nature.  Or a connection to its distant past.  That kinda depresses me a little.

Either way, when my time at the palace was done, I headed home.  Fun fact.  It is ALWAYS rush hour in China.  Unless it is the ass crack of dawn or just before the subway line closes, the subways are always packed.  I've managed to get seats before, but you have to know how to play the game and position yourself so you can grab a seat at a second's notice.  It is frustrating and tiring for me and the Summer Palace was over an hour away by subway.

So exhausted.  Still, plenty of pictures and deep thoughts up online at facebook.  Thank you VPN.

October 27-28

Yet another week goes by with little to report.  I work, I suffer through the smog, and I deal with annoying crud.  Apparently Halloween is really a big deal in China, cause everything Halloween is so much more expensive than it should be.  Anyway, I got a mask for my company's costume party, but that's about it.

Been trying different sweets and foods here.  For example, the beef steak cheetos or the mango pocky.  Not all of it's good, but worth the experience, you might say.

The last few days have been especially hectic, actually.  I had to go get my visa from my visa officers, meaning I took time out of my work day, skipped lunch, and had to travel an hour each way via subway to get my visa.  THEN, the following day I had to wake up early and go to the police station to re-register.  I've said it before, I'll say it again.  The government in China is not scary or oppressive...just damned tedious with all their paperwork.  Still, they at least seem to be more together than other places I could mention...

So, yeah, I'm very tired.  Spending this weekend in, probably the next one too.  I want to recover from finally having everything done, you might say.  I find that passion projects help with dealing with the stress of China, much like I was doing stateside.  However, since I can't perl, I've taken the time to do some minor video editing and create a series on some video game history.  It's been fun so far.

I still miss home, but I have to admit that China isn't as bad as I maybe made it out to be.  There are some things I still absolutely despise, however give and take, as they say.  Worried about expenses a little, due to the Halloween mask and my taste testing experience, but still, I'll manage one way or another.

October 30-31

Halloween...we spiced things up at the office with everyone in costumes.  Was a lot of fun.  Though, I have to admit, staying late to work at the Halloween party was significantly less so.  Lots of work in a hot costume.  Still, it's surprising how big Halloween is in China.  They, as far as I know, do not trick or treat, however it is a time for partying and merchandising.  Though with the smog, it's hard to blame them for not going outside.

We had donut biting, apple bobbing, mummy wrapping, nail painting, and mask painting.  Was a pretty cool time, but damned exhausting.  I like that my school is okay with this kinda stuff.  Will do cultural events to make the students' experience more enjoyable.  It speaks volumes about it, even if you might think of it only as a marketing event.

I also got a nice fat taste of depressing annoyance the following day.  See, in a school, work, government, whatever paperwork mistakes are inevitable and we had a few snafus at the office which left me feeling drained.  Mostly it was just sending the wrong students to the wrong classes, but still, frustrating and exhausting, as it derails a lesson something fierce.

Toilets continue to be a problem in China...I really wish they were cleaner/friendlier.  Sigh.  Anyway, I got my first payday and though I have to save most of it for my next rent payment, it feels good to actually have money.  Even if I can't really use it yet.